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The Vector

NJIT's Student Newspaper

The Vector

NJIT's Student Newspaper

The Vector

Indie Game Thing: Goat Simulator

Indie Game Thing: Goat Simulator

Have you ever played a game that you think no one would pay for? You enjoy watching people play that game, but no matter how much fun you’re having, paying $10 for that experience doesn’t make any sense to you. Worse yet, the game involves some of the most random elements you have ever seen. Well, because this is Indie Game Thing, I’m talking about a game where you play as a goat.

Sadly, this is not the Scalar. Goat Simulator tasks players with going nuts on the town as a goat. What can this goat do? The goat can lick and headbutt things. I mean, what else do goats do? Well, goats can run and jump, I guess, but besides basic platforming and “baaaaaaaaaing”, this sums up what you, a goat, can do.

If you haven’t already seen the trailers or paid attention to what I said, you, a goat that licks and headbutts things, go nuts on an unsuspecting town. Goat Simulator is definitely one of the strangest games I have played this year, if only because of the pure insanity from its simple mechanics. It’s like Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater 3 (one of my all-time favorite games) but with a goat. This game was so inspired by the legendary Tony Hawk game that the developers at Coffee Stain Studios even put in a ramp that says “Goats > Skates” as a homage.

Goat Simulator does not take itself seriously. In fact, it understands this so well that Goat Simulator flaunts its unadulterated insanity to the point that you are rewarded for breaking the game. Falling off the face of the world isn’t something new in Goat Simulator, nor is breaking the physics and models of all of the objects on the map. The game even goes as far as to give you a self-ragdoll button for those moments that you just want to enjoy falling face-first to the Earth.

Through exploring the little suburban hub in Goat Simulator, you can find all sorts of random goodies from trampolines that let you jump to your heart’s content to a pentagram that, if given sacrifices, grants you the ability to be a “devil goat”. On that note, you can be any goat you can think of. You can be a tall goat or you can be an Italian Dinosaur goat. Better yet, you can be a tall Italian Dinosaur goat. There are almost no limits to Goat Simulator because, to be frank, no one really cares! Goat Simulator is unfettered insanity of a goat that shouldn’t be doing the crazy things that it is already doing. Goats don’t usually climb ladders by using their necks to break through the rungs, while having all four legs hanging off of the ladder as if it is walking on the ground.

Goat Simulator contains enough stupidity to keep you laughing your gut out. If you play alone, there’s a good amount of addiction that comes with the amount of secrets and in-your-face achievements the game throws at you. If you’re playing Goat Simulator with friends, you are going to have a fun time, end of story.

Is it worth the $10 it is being sold for, though? No, Goat Simulator is not worth $10. It’s one fun time that doesn’t get old too fast, but it eventually gets old. It’s a joke and it definitely isn’t going to last the more times you play it, but it is one fun time. I’d suggest waiting for a sale or pooling some money with friends to enjoy being a goat.

Matthew Maravilla

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