Let’s be honest. I am green. Not in the “green with envy” sense, though. I have only been in this Business Manager position for six months. So, I am not entirely sure what I am supposed to be talking about here. In all my years of experience on a newspaper, not once did I write an end of the year sign off. That even includes when I was Editor-in-Chief of another paper.
By bringing this up, it is not my intention to show off. I simply want to highlight, though I have all this experience, I am very much inexperienced. Accepting this was not easy for me. As much as I say otherwise, I know my hamartia is my pride.
Since taking on the Business Manager mantel, I have been humbled by how much I have left to learn. Balancing a budget and managing client accounts were not skills that came first hand to me. At the beginning, I was confused and hated asking people for help. It hurt. But I realized it had to be done or else this ship would sink. And the only thing I hate other than asking for help is failing.
I understood I would not be the perfect Business Manager so I was not too hard on myself. I had some pretty big shoes to fill and not enough time to do so. I missed ads (sorry) and had to really curb my attitude with some clients (not sorry). I did it for the greater good and at the end of it all, I am pretty content with myself.
Though nothing particularly major happened that would discourage me from continuing as Business Manager, I know it is not for me. I literallycannot wait to don the Executive Editor mantle. I am eager to see what layouts I can design and am also very nervous to see how people receive them.
It seems pathetic to be wondering if people will accept me but hey, I am only human. It’s natural to have that kind of anxiety.
I am sure no matter what position I hold in The Vector, there will always be room for improvement. I have learned that life is a constant cycle of learning. There is no such thing as a know it all. Those who think they do probably know less than what they claim and are in dire need of a lesson in humility.
Amarelis Bracero